The northern nation of Norway has joined our Ski Mask International Team: SMIT. Welcome to our new SMIT member. We have alerted the entire SMIT team to the new threat from cannabis - endestin. It is not in the weed, it is in the seed. But the Norwegian police are onto it. Last month a suspect package arrived through the post, and it looked like any other innocent package containing porn or some other legal contents. But this one posed danger to society. Sent from Global Hemp, it contained seeds of the deadly weed, Cannabis sativa: hemp. Worse than smack or crack. This was the real thing, hemp. And so the SMIT team alerted the Norwegian SWAT teams who rose from their slumber, donned their Ski Mask Society uniforms and went on the rampage. SMIT and SWAT saved the day. It turned out that the seeds contained protein, and not just any protein, it had edistin. 65% of the protein in the seeds, or achenes as some pedantic botanist might call them, is edistin. But we're not fooled by the incredible edible edistin schtick, we know this is a danger to society. So thankfully, after a 7 hour siege, the package was sent back to Global Hemp. We are not relaxing security at this point though, the whole nation is now on green alert for more of these edistin containing hemp seeds.
Tune in next week for more of the adventures of SMIT and the anti-hemp brigade, which expects any minute to bust the likes of bloggers who promote hemp on sites such as Minawear, GeoMio, The Hemp Shop, and Hemp for Victory.
Tune in next week for more exciting adventures of the anti-hemp brigade, Tamsin Omond, Jonathan Ross and the Primrose Hill Society Brat Pack.
Sunday, 11 January 2009
Tuesday, 6 January 2009
We are very unhappy here at the Mark of the Mask Foundation. For one thing, Jonathan Ross has been in exile in America, where he walks Main Street on a mission to return. And so he will, but he has lost pay. This must be corrected, I would hope that some money can be taken out of other things, like the NHS, and given to this hero of the society. Why are we giving money to sick people when there are cool people like Jonathan Ross losing dosh?
There are other reasons to be depressed as sell. The girl in the top image, Tam sin Omond, has not been able to pull off any more protests and has not made her own multi-million pound deal. In fact, lots of impolite bloggers have been making some quite disparaging remarks, especially over at www.hempforvictory.blogpost.com and www.schmoontherun.blogspot.com Is he on the run for something he said? Schmoo better hope we do not catch up with him!
And then there was a real shock at the end of last year, when we found out that the Queen made a big mistake and honoured six people for their heroism on 7/7 - but NO MENTION OF RACHEL NORTH! What kind of queen is this, and that is queen with a small q...
We're sick of people like William Rodriguez and Woody Harrelson getting all the attention for saving lives and environmental activism, we want RACHEL NORTH and TAMSIN OMOND to rule! Rule! That means, get Betty Windsor another job and let's have some real Queens (with a capital Q - and I do not mean Elton John) to rule for a long long time! Move over rocket man and anyone else, the Ski Mask Society is here to make sure we get respect for our people, especially rich kids!
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